MERRY CHRISTMAS

Dear Love, 

How are you today? I hope this letter finds you well! I pray that humanity has been kinder this Christmas season! I am excited about this upcoming day of celebration, and I was just wondering what it is that you want for Christmas? I know I can't buy you anything, or give anything of earthly value! But what can I give, that would mean so much more? I have a family that safe and healthy this Christmas, and even though many of them are far I still feel them in my heart! I have a home that is always comfortable, and I am wanted... and loved! I have so much to be thankful for, so what can I give to the one who already gave it all away! I have friends that are close, giving to me all the time with nothing expected in return! I have place to work, and a car to drive! I have been given so much. And so many times I appear ungrateful, neglecting to tell the ones I love how much they mean to me. Or even to busy to drop you a line! I wish that this Christmas I could convey how I feel inside, when I think about the blessing that they have become in my life! I wish mostly to show to you  how grateful a human being can be (even though you already know everything).  I hope to shower you with gifts through out the entire year. I wish to give you time, and my ability to serve. I want to remember to say thanks everyday. And not just talk about a relationship, but pursue one! I want to be a messenger for your kingdom. A shoulder to cry on for those who are broken hearted. I want to mean what I say, and do what it is that you have called me too. I want to care more about others then myself! Beating down my Jealous heart, is just one more thing on my to do list. I must learn to be happy for those around me, for there  success is another victory! I want to give you all these gifts, because that is what you truly deserve! If there is anything else you may ask of me, let me be the first to say Yes! I will try to not let you down, and when I do I promise to get back into the game. Time is not our friend, and it's clear that we must all be working for your glory. So this Christmas I will think about what you have done... what you are doing... and what you will complete in the future! I will serve you, for as long as will last! Please except this Christmas gift! Let my tears, and sacrifice be for your Kingdom. MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Love, your daughter

Tristan

P.S. Thanks for always listening, and replying to my letters! 

THE QUEST OF THE HEART

Even in the cold dark room, I will trust that there is light.
Even in the deepest parts of this lonely ocean, I will keep treading water. 
I will not forget what I have been taught since birth,
 that my life is not my own.
Or forget the sacrifice of my Father! 


You do not have to know me well, to know where my allegiance lies! 
That I am totally undoubtedly in love, with the one who made the skies.
He is all the man I will ever need
for He gives me love and perfect peace! 

A companion He is, by my side to the end.
 A Faithful friend indeed
A light to my path, and the guide to my ever changing heart! 

I told you that I am in LOVE,  and this is no small wonder! 

He keeps my deepest secrets, and wipes my tears away. 
And even loves me, on my hardest of days
when I am unlovable, unworthy, and broken! 
He lifts my head to the sky, and calls to my soul
You have been made free, so sing sweet songs and be alive! 

I can't tell you enough about the lover, that I have come to know!
 How truly beautiful am I, when I am loving Him!
 How pure, and unselfish is this ever growing romance. 

This  epic adventure grows more stirring each day. 
I learn His ways, as He teaches me every step of the way. 
I long to learn more about Him, I want to know Him in every way! 
More deeply, more passionate, more desperate then any of my other lovers! 


I can't contain this overall since of Joyousness 
I have never been caught up in a Journey so raw and exuberant
I have never wanted anything more in all my wanderings. 
Then to love Him, and let Him Love me! 


And even when I doubt His presence, and His works! 
I see His touch everywhere from the tallest tree, to the smallest child! 
I will love Him in waiting, even if I wait for eternity. 
I will love him in plenty, and in need! 
For one moment in His presences, can bend any knee
and move the hardest of hearts to compassion.


I will love Him on top of mountain, and in the darkest of valleys. 
I will search for other unlovable people, and bring them to the hem of His garments for healing. 
I will do all this, and yet still realize that I too am in need of saving
Every day, and in every way! 


I must go now, and continue on this quest for the saviors heart

and I can't promise I wont fail you along the way. 
For I have many times been pegged for a sinner
I will try not to trip you up on your journey, for you are my brothers and sisters.
I do encourage you to make a declaration of your love, so that others will know the path that you take!
Maybe someday they too will make a choice to tread these waters and walk these paths! 

Game Plan!!!!!

So I have decided to make some very important changes to my life within the next year. And I know it is really early to start making New Years vows, but hey what can I say I like to start things  a little early. This all began when me and my mother had this crazy talk about life. I have been really down on a lot of things lately! Not very optimistic about the future, I am not really sure why because I know God has plans to prosper me and not harm me. Sometimes I just find this very hard to believe, and I am working on it! I want everything to much, and get frustrated when things don't seem to be falling into place! I with the help of a wonderful mother that I have, have made a chart of things to work on in the next year. I am already hitting the ground working in order to grow in these key area's! And the chart goes as follows:

• Physical - I am going to try my hardest to stay dedicated at a gym, and try to eat healthier. Just trying to include some healthy habits in  my life. 
• Spiritual- I am going to read more books, pray harder then ever, and try to read the Bible from cover to cover. Because I want too, nobody is forcing me. 
• Mental- Find ways to make my life less stressful. And make the most of my time. 
• Social- Contact old friends, and develop new ones... just putting myself out there. 
• Financial- sticking to my budget! 
• Educational- Berean and develop a huger for new things
• Photography- explore all that I can with my potential 
• Family- Spend even more time developing relationships
• Exploring- going to new places, and doing new things. Spending time outdoors! 
• Writing- Start my book, and not stopping! Journaling, and blogging as much as I can! Collecting quotes, and painting! 

I am going to try this next year focusing on becoming a better person, I am giving myself the holiday season to prepare! This is a choice I have made! I am going to ask myself everyday what can I do to achieve my goals! 

Well this is my plan, I hope writing it out will make everything more serious! 

A House Is Not A Home

A chair is still a chair
Even when there's no one sitting there
But a chair is not a house
And a house is not a home
When there's no one there to hold you tight,
And no one there you can kiss good night.

A room is still a room
Even when there's nothing there but gloom;
But a room is not a house,
And a house is not a home
When the two of us are far apart
And one of us has a broken heart.

Now and then I call your name
And suddenly your face appears
But it's just a crazy game
When it ends it ends in tears.

Darling, have a heart,
Don't let one mistake keep us apart.
I'm not meant to live alone. Turn this house into a home.
When I climb the stair and turn the key, 
Oh, please be there still in love with me.



Burt Bacharach -A house is not a Home


This song is so amazing, just recently listened to it on a episode of Glee. So I thought I would post it! 

Halloween Pictures

 THESE ARE JUST A FEW OF THE AMAZING COSTUMES FROM THE 1980 HALLOWEEN PARTY! SUCH A GREAT NIGHT!!!
(also a few are from work). 

THE SEASONS.wmv

The Camping Experience

      The Korean blanket that I am smothered in the middle of is the most comfortable bed I have had in a while. It's not the blanket that makes it so wonderful, it's the atmosphere that surrounds my existence for the moment. I am on the ground for one thing, seeing things at a new level. The blanket is the only thing separating me from the cold earth. It keeps the rocks, and branches from making this experience painful instead of the adventure! I breathe in, and then out seeing the smoke coming from my lungs telling me that it's going to be a cold morning. But that is OK for now, I am still in between the blankets! I haven't opened my eyes yet, but I can feel the forest stirring! I open my eyes for a moment and catch a glimpse of a doe slowly making it's way to the river, for a morning drink. The beautiful creature takes a moment and looks into the flaps of my tent. Seeing  my piercing eyes looking back! I hope my eyes convey that I mean her no harm, just that I want to drink in the beauty that is her being. One of many creations that I will always thank God for, along with nature. Always there as a steady reminder of who He really is! I know I must soon get up for the day is already begun, and if I lay here much longer it will be easier to remain. Laying down for a lifetime is such a waste of an existence! So time doesn't slow down for anybody, and the day is still young so I throw of the upper layer of blankets! The chill automatically swarms in for the kill, I am finding my breathe caught in my throat! I was so warm a minute ago, I am tempted to just pull the covers down again. But I have already come so far! There all done! I stand and slowly unzip the mesh door on the front of the tent. My senses are already peeked, somewhere someone is cooking breakfast! Oh how I long to be be warm again! I must concentrate of making a fire. Soon the fire is up and going, and my breakfast has been eaten! Off to my day of promise!  I spend the day hiking up the mountain, I spend it sitting by the water! I saw birds, funny animals and bugs, I let the mid day sun warm my skin! I walked in the leaves to hear the crunch!  I climb the tallest of trees. I take hold of life, and never let it go. At sunset I take in the breathtaking beauty of the sun setting behind the hills of the mountain. I wish in that moment that eternity started here, and that this was heaven. Just miles, and miles of God's unspoiled creation! later on I sit in a lawn chair with my feet near the fire to stay warm. My head is swarming with todays adventures, for the day held all that was promised. This is where it all hits me! What would happen if I decided to lay under the blankets and never get up! Now I might have said that I still went camping, but the day of promise would have been a waste. If I had never opened my eyes, I would never have seen the doe! I would have never thanked God for his wonderful creation. It was warm and comfortable, the best sleep I have had in a while! But as I look into the tree's and wildness that is all around me, I realized that I could have slept! I could have never found adventure, for adventure is found where there is an adventurer to seek it! My heart hurt in the idea that there are people who have set up camp, but have never moved past the shelter that is within the tents! Fear has cost this generation to much! Its time to take back the adventure, and promise. To not lay down and let time slip by, because eternity can start when we are ready! I persist that we take time to seek adventures, and make friends along the way! Promise me this that you will give it a good try! Make your life worth writing a novel about, I hope mine to be a series of novels! Thats all I have for now, but just think about that next time you are camping! Or better yet think about every time you go outdoors! 

Glee

      So after a long time of saying to myself I did not need another addiction, I decided that I would watch one episode of the show Glee! So now I am really hooked! I find myself not only in love with the music, but also with the characters. I have been in tears after episodes, and I have laughed until my sides have ached! I was watching an episode tonight that really taught me a lesson. Which I know is not alarming since I am always looking at the little things in life to teach me lessons. I am just amazed at what I thought to be a comical show, I have found the show to be so much more full of depth! I find myself wanting to sing in my room at the top of my lungs after every single episode, and just now as I write these words! Well this is just a little rant, to share with the world how I have been truly amazed by the show! Two thumbs up! 

Music to the soul

There have been so many songs, and lyrics that have really changed my life. In the past few years my life has been so much better because of the influence of music. It helps sooth the soul, and changes the way I feel about things going on in my life. I thank God that He uses music as one of the main ways to speak into my life. I was just going through my iTunes listening to some of the great music that helped my along in my journey so far. I got the idea to post some amazing lyrics that have been part of my life. Maybe they can help you as well!

• “Between what we want and what we really need”.
Gratitude (Nichole Nordeman)
This has really been something to think about! Sometimes what we want is not good for us, or God says to wait! Its hard but in the end God plan is always better, and he knows what we really need.

• “I’ll tell you I love you and I’ll honor you somehow, hear my promise to you in this New Years vow.”
Vow (Kutless)

• “Everything will change but, love remains the same”.
Love Remains the Same (Gavin Rossdale)
This is just something that is good to always be reminded of, the fact that love never changes!

• “If you realize what I just realized”
Realize (Colbie Caillat)
Why is it we realize everything just a little too late!

• “Let it roll right off your shoulder, don’t you know the hardest part is over! Let it in, let your clarity define you in the end”
Little Wonders (Rob Thomas)
Keep on going it’s almost over!

• “I’m like a bird, I will fly away. I don’t know where my soul is, I don’t know where my home is.”
I’m Like a Bird (Nelly Furtado)
Sometimes we can all feel a little out of place!

• “You would rather die, then leave us in the dark”
You where there (Avalon)
This part of the song always makes me tear up! It’s so true that Father God sacrificed everything to give us hope!

• “And suddenly I become a part of your past. I’m becoming a part that don’t last, I’m losing you and it’s effortless. Without a sound we lose sight of the ground, in the throw around. Never thought that you wanted to bring it down. I won’t let it go down till we torch it ourselves.”
Over My Head (The Fray)

• I want to see miracles, see the world changed. Wrestled the angel, for more than a name, for more than a feeling, for more than a cause. I’m singing spirit take me up in arms with you. And you’re raising the dead in me. Twenty four voices, with twenty four hearts. With all of my symphonies in twenty four parts. I’m not copping out!
24 Hours Ago (Switchfoot)
This song is just amazing! I makes me want to get out there and do something!

• Cause I’m not your princess, this ain’t a fairytale. I’m gonna find someone someday, who might actually treat me well. This is a big world that was a small town, there in my rearview mirror disappearing now.
White Horse (Taylor Swift)
Sometimes it time to move on! God’s plans are bigger!

• I need a lullaby, a kiss goodnight. Angel sweet love of my life O, I need this.
My Skin (Natalie Merchant)

• Is there love that never dies, is there peace in troubled times? Someone help me understand. Is there hope for every man?
Every Man (Casting Crowns)
The answer is that there is always HOPE!

• Now the story’s played out like this, just like a paperback novel. Let’s re-write and ending that fits, instead of a Hollywood Horror.
Someday (Nickelback)

• I should have known better, but I didn’t and I can’t go back! Life goes on!
Life Goes On (Lee Ann Rhimes)

• Will give thanks to you with gratitude for lessons learned in how to trust in you, that we are blessed beyond what we could ever dream. In abundance or in need, and if you never grant us peace, Jesus would you please.
Gratitude (Nichole Nordeman)
We must never forget to thank our Father for all He has given to us!

• I’ve lived in this place, and I know all the faces. Each one is different but they’re always the same. They mean me no harm, but it’s time that I faced it. They’ll never allow me to change. But I never dreamed home would end up where I don’t belong. I’m moving on.
I’m moving On (Rascal Flatts)
Isn’t this the truth?

• I’m on the shore now, of the wildest river, and I kneel and beg for mercy from the sky. But no one answers, I’ve gotta take my chances ‘cause something deep inside me’s crying “this is why you are alive!”

Thirsty (Chris Rice)
This is a really old song, but it speaks to me! You have just got to jump in and do something, because this is why we are alive

• It’s beginning to get to me
(Snow Patrol)

• We want more than this world’s got to offer. We want more then the wars of our fathers, and everything inside screams for second life.
Meant to Live (Switchfoot)
I want more!

• And it’s alright, yeah I’ll be fine. Don’t worry ‘bout this heart of mine. Just take you love and hit the road. There’s nothing you can do or say, you’re gonna break my heart anyway. So just leave the pieces when you go.
Leave the Pieces (The Wreckers)

• We will find two destinations!
Chances (Five for Fighting)

• When everything inside me, looks like everything you hate.
You’re On Fire (Switchfoot)
You still love me!

• Time together isn’t ever quite enough. When you and I are alone, I’ve never felt so at home. What will it take to make or break this hint of love? We need time, only time.
Saltwater Room (Owl City)

• If I ever needed you Lord, it’s now!
(Casting Crowns)

• Chances are when said and done. Who’ll be the lucky ones, who make it all the way? Though you say I could be your answer, nothing lasts forever no matter how it feels today.
Chances (Five for Fighting)

• Is there a better bet than love? What you are is what you breathe. You gotta cry before you sing.
Chances (Five for Fighting)
You got to go through some pain to find what is meant for you!

• Love, such a silly game we play.
Love (Matt White)

• We need each other to have and to hold.
(Phil Collins)
We are all each other have!

• So this is how it ends. This is where it all goes down. This is what I don’t love you feels like.
Red Light (David Nail)

• Other waters I’ve been drinkin’ but they always leave me empty like before. Satisfaction, all I’m askin’ could I really feel this thirsty if there weren’t something more?
Thirsty (Chris Rice)

• The current is strong, my arms are weak. But you are the branch within my reach. In this sea of change, understanding was swept away.
Sleeping at Last (Currents)

• I’ve never been to half of the places, but your postcard collection makes me crave. A little space, a little ways out of the city to the grace of another land, another tongue, another time.
Letter in my Pocket (Bethany Joy Lenz)

• And you said I know that this will hurt. But if I don’t break your heart, then things will just get worse. If the burden seems too much to bear, remember the end will justify the pain I took to get us there
Let it all out (Relient K)
Once again God’s plans are bigger

• When the oceans rise and thunders roar, I will soar with you above the storm. Father you are king over the flood I will be still and know you are God.
Still (Hillsong)

• What do say to taking chances?
Taking Chances (Celine Dion)

• I watched from a distance as you made life your own…every sky was your own kind of blue…and I wanted to know how that would feel, and you made it so real…you showed me something that I couldn’t see. You opened my eyes and you made me believe.
Crazier (Taylor Swift)

• Can I believe you hold an exclamation point, for every question mark?
Naive (Chris Rice)

• When I heart breaks, no it don’t breakeven
Breakeven (The Script)

• And in this crazy life and through these crazy times it’s you, it’s you, you make me sing. You’re every line; you’re every work, your everything.
Everything (Michael Buble)

• Learning to breathe, I’m learning to craw, I’m finding that you and you alone can break my fall. I’m living again awake and alive; I’m dying to breathe in these abundant skies.
Learning to Breathe (switchfoot)

• So I would understand if you were out of patience. And I would understand if I were out of chances. But you mercies are new every morning. So let me wake with the dawn, and when the music is through, or so it seems to be. Let me sing a new song.
Mercies New (Nichole Nordeman)

• I feel bad, that I don’t feel Bad
I feel Bad (Rascal Flatts)

• Nothing cures the hurt, you bring on by yourself. Just remembering how we were the special two.
The Special two (Missy Higgins)


• Clouds of sulfur in the air, bombs exploding everywhere its heartbreak warfare. Once you want to begin no one ever really wins, its heartbreak warfare. If you want more love why don’t you say so?

Heartbreak Warfare (John Mayer) 

To: My Dad

You are the one I always look to, in this battle we call life. 

 And you know just about everything there is to know. 

Wisdom comes with age, and you got that...lol! 

You always make me laugh with your dry since of humor. 

I am the cause of every grey hair on your head, and grey is your color! So your welcome! 

You are an inspiration to many, with your quiet nature and big heart! 

You have never been afraid of tears, I like that! 

Listening is one of your gifts, thanks for the ear!

Thanks for always believing in me. 

I owe you for everything that I have, but I know I will never be able to repay you. 

And you know that too! 

You never want me to grow up and leave, but know this "I will always come home"! 

You have showed me how to love the church. 

You have pointed the way to my heavenly Father, and encouraged me in my love for Him! 

"No one can ruin your day, without your permission!"  You used to tell me!

You drove me to school, and let me listen to my radio station (Instead of politics) 

You give me pattern of what to look for in my future husband! 

You are strong, but very kind. 

You like to watch silly movies with me! 

You took me to watch plays as a kid, and came to watch me in the plays I was in (even though not as good).

You where my teacher. Everything I know about History I learned from you. 

You make my Laugh, when I am sad! 

I miss you when I haven't seen you for a couple of days! 

I look to you in times of trouble. 

I sleep better when you are home! 

I know you don't like my music, but that's cool! 

I wish I had more pictures of us together, so lets take more OK!

I remember Jolly Ranchers in your pocket during church. 

I always want a sip of your coke, because yours taste better! 

You never get on Facebook, but you do have one. 

I love hearing stories about you growing up! 

You have a wonderful smile, and freckles like me. 

I am privileged to be your child. 

I will always be a daddy's girl!

I am trying to understand politics. 

Maybe someday you can show me how to play your baseball dice game?

I loved running out on the field after a game, when I was a kid (Just because my daddy was the coach!)

I have always been proud, that you are my dad. 

You would take any job to support us, and that shows character! 

You are someone worth getting to know. 

I am so glad that I have gotten to Love you, as much as I do!

I love your mixed up Christmas carols.

I love going camping, and fishing with you. 

You have changed my life, for the better!

Please believe me when I say "I am glad you are my dad". 

I love your hugs, and when you kiss my forehead. 

You make me feel safe. 

You have always been honest!

Changes have been easier with you! 

You have made this family, and it is a GREAT family!

You are very organized, and neat! 

You make me smile!

You are a great guy, and everybody thinks so (People tell me all the time). 

I love you!

There is no other way to say it! You are the best dad, and that's to truth. 

You have made hard choices for this family!

You have always been there!

You are not perfect, but you try! 

You have never backed down on your principles!

You are a great man of God! And the best father a girl could ask for!

I need you to know that I love you, and that I will always be your little girl!
 Love Your Daughter

Tristan Brooke